fracas

Last week we learned about the geoduck, which is not really a duck at all, but a clam that tends to either scare people away, or prompts them to ask for a cigarette. The fraccers were a little on the tame side, with a resounding majority professing (and some offered TMI as to why) that when it comes to the geoduck and their lips… never the twain shall meet.

This week, I’ve found what might just be the real reason Gwyneth Paltrow chose to name that little one who sprung forth from her loins, Apple Blythe Alison Martin. Yes, I know the official word is that she named the tot Apple because apples are whole, sweet and crisp, but rumour has it that Gwyneth, while recuperating from the long labour and birth, was presented with a fruit basket by former bff Madonna… and in it was this little gem.

For some reason, after that… she couldn’t think of another name that seemed to ‘fit’.

I have a feeling this apple (yes I know some will see it and think it’s a potato, but I insist… it’s an apple. Honestly, do you really think Madonna would visit Gwyneth Paltrow and bring her a potato basket) will inspire many of you… in many additional ways, and that makes this old fracas very happy indeed.

As is per the custom with the Friday Food Porn postings, I shall provide you with a lovely recipe to go along with this week’s food porn choice. Keep this recipe handy so that if you should happen to have occasion to receive a fruit basket from Madonna, and it contains an apple such as this one, you can just cook it up instead of subjecting the fruit of your  loins to going through life named Apple.

Apple-Cherry Fruit Spread

Servings: Makes 1 1/2 cups
Nutrition Information: Protein: .06g; Fat: .08g; Carbohydrate: 3g; Fiber: .4g; Sodium: .02mg; Cholesterol: 0mg; Calories: 11

Ingredients:
3 Fuji apples, peeled, cored, and coarsely chopped
1/2 cup dried cherries
1/2 cup fruit juice or water
1 cinnamon stick
1/2 teaspoon finely grated lemon zest

Method:
1) In medium saucepan, combine apples, cherries, fruit juice, and cinnamon stick. Cover and bring to simmer over medium heat; cook 15 minutes, stirring frequently. Uncover and reduce heat to low; cook 15 to 20 minutes longer or until apples are very soft but retain their shape.

2) Remove cinnamon stick. Add lemon zest to apple mixture. In blender or food processor, puree apple mixture until chunky spread forms. Cool completely. Chill before serving. Store in refrigerator.

I’m pretty sure none of these folks ever received a fruit basket from Madonna, but I do know that a few of them will understand how this is usually the apple of someone’s eye!

[Image Source]
[Recipe Source]