fracas

Today was DaddyPapersurfer’s birthday.  I know it’s still “today” for me, and you’re probably wondering if I’ve been dipping into the cooking sherry to say today was… but in DaddyPapersurferland, it’s already almost tomorrow morning.

So today was his birthday. 

Alas, I’ve been at meetings this evening and though here I am now, discovering the old geezer bouncing birthday boy had a special day, I feel that despite offering him a shipment of pads in response to his galloping trots dilemna, that I really ought to get him something else. Something… a little more special and memorable.

Because fracas does special thing for special people.

I’ve searched out sexy women jumping out of cakes, whacked out crazy birthday cakes and even a hot air balloon cake for some of the fraccy friends. If I know about your day, probably I’ll try find you something special too.

So Daddy deserves something special for sure.

He having the trots though, I thought it best not to be serving up anything food-related and so… because I’d heard a rumour that there lives somewhere, a twin, I decided no effort was too great for a gift for Daddy P.

It wasn’t easy. I looked high and I looked low, and you know… I almost missed him. I mean, I really had planned on wandering the streets looking for that famous mug. I’d even thought that I should probably be looking for someone in a blue shirt. I wandered so long, I wore out the heels on some of my best red shoe diary shoes. No matter though, for Daddy it was all worth it. And then… then… when I was so tired I just had to sit down, I found this little cafe that happened to have wi-fi and was playing Pretty Woman (though not on some big ole screen since we don’t have those here in Canada… no, it was on a 20″ RCA model housed in a beautiful wooden chest, set up on some lovely carved footings).

I could hardly believe my luck. It was just the kind of cafe I could vaguely recall reading about online somewhere… can’t recall just where, I’m sure it was some silly blog I landed at on one of those days when you click too many links after dipping into the cooking sherry dilligently doing all of your online banking. I sat down exhausted, and lo and behold but if the charming little man who arrived to take my order wasn’t the answer to the prayers of a this tuckered tootsie.

Indeed. I knew it at once.  

He was an amusing old chap… had stories of his youth, a wonderful wife he affectionatly calls the Terrible Blondesse, a couple of rather handsome sons (though one brought him such terrible worries the way he would draw things all over his body) and if you can believe it… but he spoke fondly of his treasured pet emu, Bertram, and the time he and some very dear friends spent months locked up in a barn, trying to set a world’s record for the longest rope ever hand woven on a Canadian farm. He was a little wistful recalling certain friends though. It seems there was one who was aptly named 50squeen for her obsession with Elvis, and another who was a wonderful artist and at times went days eating nothing but cheese because her husband at times, forgets to bring home the bacon because he’s too busy imagining himself to be the “Hoff”.

I tried to learn more of his friends but when there was mention of a certain American President-loving blonde on a calendar kept on the wall in the barn, he became a little unsettled. He changed the subject right away and asked me not to mention it to the Terrible Blondesse… should I ever meet her.

He excused himself briefly, explaining that he had taken part in a marathon for a good Canadian charity that day and ever since, was suffering the runner’s trots.

It was all just too much. I didn’t really need to, but when he returned, I just had to ask and the answer didn’t surprise me one little bit.

His name?

He told me. I asked him again. I could not believe my ears. He repeated himself.

That was it. I jumped up (upsetting my table and spilling the ice water) and began to do a little twirl.

I could be no happier. I’d found at last, the gift I knew was perfect. I’d found here in Canada… the long lost brother of our very own DaddyPapersurfer.

I asked him if he’d allow me to take this photograph and place it here so that Daddy might see, rejoice in and look forward to a visit from none other than the very famous, very dapper and very Daddy Maplesurfer.

My life is complete now.

Happy Birthday DaddyPapersurfer, from your very dear friend Fracas.