Filed under: Amusement, Boobs, Children, Entertainment, Funny, Humor, Kids, Life, Memories
Candace over at not that i don’t love my kids wrote about something absolutely hilarious. Well, at least it is to this my-kids-are-all-grown-up-and-that-won’t-happen-to-me-again mom. Judge for yourself.
- “The very serious Pediatric Nephrologist was explaining grade one reflux to me while out of nowhere my daughter started squeezing my right breast. I told her to stop. She started squeezing the other one. The Very Serious and Very Young P.N. (no need to write that out again) started to giggle. And I said to my daughter, “Please don’t do that anymore in public.” In public. As if we sat around all day at home watching Dora and Boobie squeezing.”
And this got me thinking about all the nutty and embarassing things that our kids (and sometimes our spouses) do to us that prompt us to reply, “Please don’t do that anymore in public.”
I thought it would be a fun idea, to ask everyone to comment on the most embarassing thing their chid (or spouse) ever did to them in public.
To make the post really pop, I went looking for just the right image. After some time, and a lot of photos of kids picking their noses, Paula Abdul jokes, and an unusually freaky number of men’s hairy boob shots, I came across this absolutley most perfect image of all. Click it to see it full size.
Thanks to Craig Mitchelldyer’s skills [1], Candace will know that she is not alone in the club of the boob-fondled.
And please, if you think this is a fun idea, feel free to copy this post to your own blog with a link back here so we can all enjoy each others’ embarassment together! My “do not copy” rules won’t apply here.
[1] Disclaimer: The photo belongs to Craig. Please don’t be confused about that and please don’t save it to do anything other than credit it back to him at http://craigmitchelldyer.blogspot.com/2005/01/one-of-funniest-things-i-have-ever.html.
Filed under: Amusement, Entertainment, Friday, Fun, Funny, Humor, Lists, Oddities, Random, Random Thoughts, Who Cares
… and other usefullless information for a Friday!
1. Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated
(No, that doesn’t mean you should refrigerate your condoms. They’re only called rubbers…)
2. Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
(I thouht everyone already knew that redheads were smarter…)
3. Chocolate was used as medicine during the 18th century. It was believed that chocolate could cure a stomach ache.
(I have no problem with this theory…)
4. In the 1800’s, people believed that gin could cure stomach problems.
(Again… what’s the problem? Why do people chuckle at these old fashioned medical practices?)
5. You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.
(And some of the shows are quite conducive to that…)
6. Those stars and colours you see when you rub your eyes are called phosphenes.
(But what do they call the ones you see after too much of that 1800’s style medicine?)
7. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad in first class.
(Noted. I’ll stop serving my family olives and maybe I’ll be able to buy more shoes.)
8. Hershey’s Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it’s kissing the conveyor belt.
(Desperate for porn much?)
9. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
(So those teenagers that wear knit hats (toques – pronounced tooooooks if you’re Canadian) are just one big walking infection then? Niiice…)
10.Heroin used to be a cough medicine for children. A German company (Bayer) registered heroin as a trademark.
(Please don’t tell this to the people who comment on my SallyD post. They don’t need any encouragement…)
11. 1 in every 200 people is a psychopath and they look just like everyone else.
(Sheds a whole new light on those kids on MySpace who play that I-need-to-have-1783-people-on-my-friends-list game…)
12. A sneeze travels out of your mouth at over 100 mph!
(So if I sneeze out the window while traveling on the highway, my sneeze will actually get where we’re going first?)
13. Ketchup was sold in the 1830’s as medicine.
(I’ll just stick with the chocolate and gin, thanks. I’ve never liked ketchup much.)
14. Like fingerprints, everyone’s tongue print is different.
(I can see why the police go with the fingers though….)
15. Human thigh bones are stronger than concrete and the strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Ahhh… an explanation for the useful fact below…)
16. For every ‘normal’ webpage, there are five porn pages.
(See above.)
17. The right lung is slightly larger than the left.
(Ummm… in my world we just call it a boob, and it’s actually normal for one to be slightly bigger than the other…)
18. More people are killed by donkeys than in plane crashes annually.
(Although this factoid doesn’t appear to be true, that explains my aunt’s irrational fear of donkeys…)
19. It is the female lion who does more than 90 percent of the hunting, while the male is afraid to risk his life, or simply prefers to rest.
(Again, in my world, they’ve been calling those females cougars… not lions and this is exactly why they’re out in bars looking for younger guys…)
20. It is estimated that millions of trees in the world are accidentally planted by squirrels who bury nuts and then forget where they hid them!
(So not knowing where your nuts were last night is actually a good thing? Huh! I’ll be damned…)
21. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.A pig’s orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.
(So they aren’t really seeing God, they just think they are?)
22. An adulterous Greek male was sometimes punished by the removal of his pubic hair and the insertion of a large radish into his rectum.
(And you were complaining about that “Before he cheats” song Mark? I’ll bet a louisville slugger sounds a whole lot more appealing now… )
23. The average person laughs 13 times a day.
(So hopefully I’ve gotten you through the rest of Friday and all of Saturday with these.)
Facts Source: http://www.stunning-stuff.com
Disclaimer: Please don’t complain to me if you know one of these “facts” is rubbish. It’s called humour… dont’ take life so seriously, it’ll kill you in the end.)
